Episode 261

September 19, 2016

It's been a rocky week at Horsingham Downs for slightly less than one reason.

We ordered 18 tons of pea gravel for the games room and then realized we MEANT to have ordered the crushed gravel but it was too late after the pea-gravel seeds were planted under the floor-boards and that we had actually done so in the local YWCA by mistake. 

That's fine since gender-neutral bathrooms don't mind how you pee.

This post will soon be bulldozed in favour of an even worse one. 

You must also provide your own 'cricket' foley.

Eddie Murphy

Episode 260

September 12, 2016

Episode 260 has brought the tragedy of 9/11 back to life in the same way that 9/11 brought the tragedy of the Amazonian Rubber Wars back life to bounce off of our collective unconscious like some sick, unending game of 'dodge-the-Dodge Duster as it careers through the high-school parking lot and totals Mr. Steinson's 79 AMC Pacer. Gold with Red Interior. $600 OBO. No tire lickers...


Episode 259

September 5, 2016

It Takes a Nation of Onions to Hold us Back (from being funny) and we bring the 'ions' (Pronounced 'yunns') this week straight in 'yo ringy ol' face!

If you replace the olive in a Martini with a cocktail-onion they call it a 'Gibson'. 
They could also try to replace this podcast with something worthy of praise like a brand-name guitar. Like a 'Fender' for instance.
We're talking to you… 

Episode 258

August 29, 2016

Words support us this week as we have two dynamic guest-hosts and one host who best embodies the phrase "Static Cling".

That would be Flat Cap. 

He's very awful(ly good).

At typing.


Episode 257

August 22, 2016

"Nosferatu and I" is another failed project from the same vole-plex, mouldy, hay-loft couches that brought you: "Sunday in the Abandoned Industrial Park with Jordan", "The Phantom of Warren's Altima", and "Flat Cap Expressed!"

Sorry Gavin, it's in my mouth.

Episode 256

August 15, 2016

As the Stigmata of our beloved Lord represents His grace and suffering, the ear-holes of our sainted listeners are the Torans through which they are expelled from their respective Xanadus into the tortuous Golgotha of our unfunniness.

Don't wait around three days for things to improve either. This isn't "This Arimathean Life" after all.

You ARE going to "make it" after all though.



Episode 255

August 8, 2016

Hot Dog news has been slow this month which is odd considering the Summer-time is prime territory for Hot Dogs and their love of the outdoors.

Bugs Bunny once said "There's nothing like a hot-dog cooked out-of-doors!".

The end.


Episode 254

August 1, 2016

Anyone who has seen 'Lawrence of Arabia' remembers that it's not that it hurts when you put your finger into the candle flame it's 'not minding that it hurts' that is the key to deciding that watching 'Lawrence of Arabia' would be WAY less painful than completing this sentence.

Also much like 'Lawrence of Arabia' this podcast is a patchwork of lie's, half-truths and Half-Life Truths.

The time it takes fifty-percent of this podcast to decay?

When is the Sun supposed go Nova again? 

No go.


Episode 253

July 25, 2016
Timothy Leary once thought that LSD was the key to an enlightened future for Humanity.

Luckily the Universe turned Mr. T into a pillar of Sugar Cubes before we did to space-time what the Brown Acid did to a mud-bog full of trust-fund kids and Joe Cocker.

Turn it into a Pillar of Sugar-Icosahedrons.

Google wins again.

Episode 252

July 18, 2016

We recommend you be on Sarsgaard this week lest you engage in a gambit that leaves you pinned after an unfortunate exchange of pieces loses you a lot of material and you end up being mated and checked on H5 (The King's Side).

I apologize. 

I promise this will be the last time I default to a Texas Hold 'Em analogy in lieu of Billiards is sometimes called Pool.

Hot Dog Polo?

Hot Dog Polo.